Hello everyone this is my first post so I don’t know how it goes. I don’t know how to say it nicely so I will just dive in. I am a pedophile I hate it. Today has been a really hard day I don’t want to leave my office because I’m afraid I will see a child but I’m starving. I want to kill myself or at least peel my skin off. I’m so sick. Why can’t I stop thinking this way? It hurts so bad I need to medicate but I won’t do that to a child. I need to hurt I deserve that. But do I deserve the relief that comes from it? I’m so confused. I promised my therapist I wouldn’t hurt myself but I don’t know if I can make it.