It's been a rough week for me. I don't talk to many people, but there are a select few I text with on occasion. This past week, not one, but TWO, left me feeling embarrassed and rejected. The first was a female I've known for several years and considered as close to a 'friend' as I've ever known. We were texting fairly regularly, and I was going by her house to visit fairly regularly also. I noted she basically just quit texting without explanation. Then, I noted when I'd text about visiting she'd have plans. Finally, she text stating she just didn't want to be friends with me any longer. She went on to say she never really liked me, but felt sorry for me, and I was just a constant drain on her energy. I text back that I appreciated her honesty and was sorry I made her feel that way. There's been no communication since. The other was a male who I've also known for several years. We've been texting regularly, but I haven't seen him in person for awhile. I text during down times in my day, and asked at one point if I was being a bother or interrupting his work day. He said he liked receiving my text and it was no bother. I continued texting. This evening he texts me saying my texting him all day really kind of pissed him off because he does have a job he's expected to do and he can't get it done when I'm blowing up his phone. Even though I'm in a different state, I feel so embarrassed and just want to hide and cry. His reaction was a complete contradiction to his earlier text! I don't think I'll talk to him anymore because now I just feel too self conscious about it.
I've never been good at making 'friends'. Somehow, I always seem to say or do the wrong things. I'm so socially awkward and our of place!
Two people who've never met reject me in the same week. Sure leaves me feeling pretty crappy about myself. I just want to hide in my house and avoid everyone now.