Hi Skeezyks, sometimes fantasy can go a little way towards taking away from the depression. And even if it is an impossibility (in practical terms) it can give you just a little more courage (?), feeling of "rightness" to push that little bit further in your life.
It's maybe more "harmful" when you don't see much else in your life other than how it is now, and how you wish it could be/how it isn't/how it can't be.
BUT I reckon you have it in you to use that fantasy more as a comfort/an acceptance/a chance to acknowledge and value that other side of you?
And you know you can use that in "pushing a bit more on the boundaries" in your life right now. Doesn't have to be anything "major" but just using some opportunities to "let go", be yourself a bit more?
Do you think you could pick up contact with more trans YouTubers though? It seems like it was an important part of your life?? And maybe they could give you some more support, just the same as you could give them some support.



Alison