I understand what you meant by give and take; and yes, it is like she wants to give and foster a certain closeness that I do not want. But she has no boundaries in her attempts to wiggle her way into my life and that of my family. In my posts I have said that I sometimes return her calls or respond somewhat to her attempts. But what is certain, is that I have tried, with no avail to set boundaries, which to her seem more a challenge than a hint to back off. A perfect example of her behavior is her mother; she hates her mother yet she talks to her just about every day.??? Oh well, I even wanted to call her today, but only if I would tell her to back off. And I didn't because I wans't sure if I could be mean. I have been mean before with her on the phone, but only if instigated by her. I really feel now like I am waiting to blow, like how someone waits for a reason to come along to break off a relationship or something. My hope is when I do that she will go away and never come back. We'll see if she calls monday, and that just might be the catalyst I need.