I should clarify, there are no Pdocs that accept my medicare advantage plan that is duel medicaid and medicare. If I had straight medicare I would be eligible for community mental health care, but I need this advantage plan for my physical problems with my spine and bones.

Last night I started the lamictal and other than a headache and foggy cotton brain, no other problems, and these should get better as I get used to it. But, and this is really good I slept almost 9 hours, broken up but was able to return to sleep! I also have no appetite but that's good too!
This is the first time I've gained weight during a mixed episode.

Thanks for the reassurance about the meds. I'm willing to take them cause things are really bad, but also scared considering my past experiences with meds. Everyone at the PES clinic really understood my past experiences with the meds, no one said it was me not the meds. If this is the new psych attitude I like it. It was really reassuring to get that validation and acceptance from the people there.

Oh, what I meant about having months is that I couldn't wait that long for my plan to get an appointment with their counselor to start treatment. Shes a RN trained in psych and can do psych meds but it takes a long time to get an appointment and yeah I know the hospital is there but I'd rather not if I can avoid it. Here the hospitals are just custodial, you are safe from self harm, and medicated, but you are treated like a prisoner who has done wrong against society not a patient.