On top of all my anxiety disorders and depression I'm also awfully afraid of two things: spiders and flying (so I've basically got arachnophobia and pteromerhanophobia/aviophobia).

I've never really done anything to try to "get over" my fear of spiders (I just avoid them) but I've forced myself to fly quite a bit over the past few years when visiting family. It got a bit better after a while. The physical symptoms of the panic attacks I used to get when at an airport and on an airplane almost disappeared. I even learned to not be afraid of airports (after being forced to spend 22 hours on an airport on my own during a snow chaos a couple of years ago). The thoughts were still there though ("What if we crash?", "I don't want to die" etc).

But yeah, all in all flying went better than it ever had before. I felt like I had made a lot of progress, which I was thankful for. However, that all changed during Christmas last year. My boyfriend's family live in another country in Europe and we had to fly there and back during Christmas. Both of those flights were terrible. There was a lot of turbulence. So much turbulence that even my boyfriend, who's not afraid of flying, was pretty scared. I panicked. Since then even the thought of flying scares me.

I'm currently at my parents' for Easter and my boyfriend and I had to fly here since they live in another part of the country (I had to move for university). I was very scared. Things were ok during take-off and most of the flight but landing was pretty awful. It was really windy and bumpy and shaky and scary. I just wanted to cry. And now, even though I enjoy being here with my family, I can't stop worrying about the fact that I need to fly home again tomorrow night. My mind keeps painting these pictures of the plane crashing and me dying etc. It doesn't matter that I've read that it would pretty much take nineteen thousand years to succumb to a fatal accident if I flew every day. It doesn't matter that I've read that flying is pretty much the safest way to travel (I've read you're about nineteen times less likely to die in an airplane than in a car). It doesn't even matter that you're more likely to die by a bee sting than in an airplane. I'm still terrified.

It really bothers me that I made progress and then sort of regressed. It really bothers me that my fear trumps logic and reason. I don't want to fly tomorrow. I don't want to.

Any advice on how to get over this or how to think differently or something? I don't want to be scared.