You are not gay , you have hocd. I suffer from hocd myself and its a living hell . The one thing you need to stop is checking , or looking in your past for signs tjat you could be gay , ocd will throw false memories and doubts at you , trust me i know , in year 7 i always though this guy was so cool cause he was goodlooking and got girls and i wanted to be like him , but ocd confuses everything and makes me think i liked him or something . Its horrible !
Seek help when you can