Hello everyone,

Its been a long time for me to visit this forum, last time it helped me a lot and thank you to everyone.

So its now, today, exactly 4 months that i am in a relationship with a very beautiful girlfriend that i love a lot and i show my love all the ways i can. Last month for her birthday i took her out to a romantic restaurant and i surprised her with a Minion birthday cake that she didn't expect and i also gave her a watch as a present, she liked both a lot

My girlfriend generally is the type that she won't easily show her feelings and emotionally, this makes it difficult for me but i am trying to cope and concentrate on small things that she does for me and just stand on those small things and i try to keep them and remember them.

Last Saturday [12th] she asked a another man about the time of a football match, this man is an EX-boyfriend. I am fine with her talking to him, so she asked him what time is it and he provided the information.

Then he tells him:
She: Thank you my messenger.
He: No problems, i just want 2 kisses
She: One kiss is enough

So obviously that conversation was something i didn't like, this conversation was made in front of me. I discussed it with her but she did not admit doing anything wrong, she says its meant friendly but my question how do i know he meant it friendly? One of her closest and best friends also had a bad argument with my girlfriend regarding this issue and they are no longer friends due to this issue as her friend finds that this is completely wrong.

The next day she also sent a kiss via facebook to the same guy despite spending Saturday and Sunday talking about this issue.

On Saturday evening she said "You are the only guy that i want" and gave a big kiss. I am trying to put what happened behind in the past but i need advise am i doing the right thing?

Over the week, it was Easter aswell, we met very few days with my girlfriend and we met only after me pressurizing too much and reaching my personal limits about pressurizing, i don't like to pressurize someone so much, she was all the time trying to find excuses that she is tired, that she also has her job and we don't have enough time, that she doesn't have petrol, that there is a lot of traffic.
With each excuse i found a solution:
No petrol > ok i come and bring you
Too tired > ok i come home and bring you
Job > it doesn't matter we'll meet for as much time as we can
Traffic > ok i'll show another route with no traffic

At the end we met up on Thursday and Friday for 2 or so hours and we met on Sunday [yesterday] aswell at 10pm after me trying to get her to meet up for 4 hours.

My girlfriend doesn't share her bad times, whenever she doesn't feel well i learn about it from her facebook and when i ask her about it she doesn't really want to share things with me and i am having a difficult time. She seems that she only wants me to know about her good times.

My girlfriend also generally changes her mind easily, today she wants to be with me and maybe tomorrow she'll start re-thinking and say to me i want to seperate without anything happening before and then i'll send her some good things that i love her that i need her and she'll be fine until next time.

I have a great amount of patience generally, i love her a lot.

Unfortunately this instability caused me to be forced to quit my job last month, i did find a new job to make a new start. What basically happened was that my girlfriend didn't like my times of work i worked 4pm - 12:30am midnight - i know i understand not a good schedule but unfortunately this is what i have. Now i have a new job and schedule is 3pm - 12am still my girlfriend isn't happy because she wants me to work for example 9am - 5pm or something similar as she wants the nights to be free. This is mounting an extreme amount of pressure to me and i have no idea what to do, some days i think i should just quit my job and not find a new one as i can't withstand the pressure anymore its damaging me and i am loosing my patience more easily now.

Yesterday she told me that i am not ready to have a relationship, but then she showed a lot of emotions and feelings with me and a lot of kisses etc so i have no idea what and how she meant it. She also said she will make me the perfect man for her, is that good or bad? Also yesterday we went to the cinema together and she kissed me in the public, something she doesn't really do usually.

Right now i am feeling hopeless with negative thoughts coming to my mind, i don't really know if she wants me if she wants to be with me i don't know what i am doing with her and how i should be. I am thinking of suicide, i am loosing my hope my patience and i have no idea what to do.

I should also mention that i am thinking of moving apartments to be opposite her work, is this a wise move or am i rushing and i should wait more or should i proceed and see how and if things will change?

I hope i explained my situation well i do feel desperate with many thoughts passing my mind.