MdngtRain!!!! You're not bothering people!!! Absolutely not us on here!!!
How you feel really matters, you're not choosing to feel this way, you just are!!
And we/I want to try to help!!
And as for asking for more help from your wife/T/anyone, that is so not a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength!! So don't hesitate to do that if you need to/want to. You deserve support!! As much as it takes!! However often!!
And, yes, we're right here for you, if we can help even a little in what you're going through.
Alison