Thanks for the replies. There are a lot more details that affect the situation. I mentioned that she is my first relationship, I lost my virginity to her. Before I met her, I was suicidal. I was ready to kill myself. But she gives me a reason to live. I do love my family too, but things were just getting so bad that I wanted to just disappear. I know you'd say well if you love your family then you wouldn't kill yourself. Well, there comes a point when in my mind the pain goes over the line.

I seriously thought that I would never have a relationship or anything. I don't want to say I was desperate, but I was. But its not like this woman is a bad choice or anything. She is truly great. She isn't anything to "settle" for.

healingme4me, I know she has a special place in her heart for me, she tells me how much she loves me every day now. Since I am still sort of "recovering" after spending most of my life being depressed, I don't have a very high self-esteem, and she knows this. She tells me she likes me more than I will ever know.

I am just a people pleaser and it is overwhelming for me right now.