i was once where you were at. i never thought i would escape the darkness. then i discovered wellbutrin. other antidepressants didnt work, but it sure did the trick. it was the magic wand i had been searching for all those years. that and therapy. two years was all i took it for and the depression still hasnt come back. it was a true miracle for me. dont ever give up. it can happen when you least expect it. take care.