My boyfriend is an alcoholic--we have been together for 5 and 1/2 years. It has been a real struggle over the last year because I am in recovery. It feels like the booze is tearing us apart. Well, yesterday he checked himself into detox. I am happy for him. I am proud of him. I am also amazed and in shock that he really did it. I find myself having mixed emotions. Most of me is absolutely thrilled, but a small part of me is scared and dreading the change. The first year is so difficult--it is loaded with changes and challenges. I know, I was there--I've already gone thru it. I don't want to have to deal with that crap again. I feel absolutly disgusted with myself that I could even think such selfish thoughts. I know I will pull myself together and be supportive of him because I love him. I want him to get sober. I guess I am still in shock that he really is going thru detox.