Koojriu,

I have problems with holidays too. But we are not alone with that challenge as a lot of people struggle during holidays. Because holidays tend to bring on more stress and emotional challenges it can be hard not to turn to an unhealthy coping method that different people turn to when the stress/anxiety/emotional challenge gets hard.

Each person is different depending on their history, but typically IMHO often families fail to understand how a person with PTSD struggles and if that happens it can be extremely uncomfortable as the desire to isolate and avoid can be high and the guilt that takes place often also becomes a challenge too it can also be extremely lonely too. I always experience a bad PTSD cycle when holidays come even though I wish that would not take place.

I thought about starting a thread because I really struggle with holidays myself. I get overwhelmed with too many bad memories and the fact that my family doesn't really understand PTSD and the gravity and complex way the holidays affect me.

You could talk about how you are challenged here, I am sure others will be supportive and understanding, even share how they struggle too. I think what is helpful is to be around others that actually do understand, it helps a person realize that they are not alone with this challenge. Therapists are always very busy around the holidays helping countless people find ways to get through them. We all tend to think that we are alone with how we struggle and what is considered the ideal way a holiday
is celebrated, but what we don't realize is this "ideal" is not really happening with others and only not us. We tend to have these deep messages about how it is supposed to be but often that deep subconscious message is just not a "reality" a picture that really happens "only for others", the reality is, the holidays are a challenge for many, many
people.

The important thing to work on is making sure you do "not" self punish. I know that isn't easy with PTSD, but do your best to recognize the negative symptoms and that they are just symptoms and don't mean you should allow yourself to feed into them.

You are welcome to talk about "how" you are challenged, sometimes that helps because here at least, you will be exposed to others that can provide you with the kind of sympathy and support you need to help you "mourn" whatever you are struggling with. That is where I have a hard time, I really don't have "any" family member that can comfort me the way I need it and that challenge is brought into "focus" when every holiday comes.

(((Caring Hugs))))
OE