it sounds like you need to get over your negative self talk. she obviously doesn't find you to be disgusting, only you see yourself that way and that will be the down fall of this relationship. she obviously likes you very much. she has told you so, told you she wants to kiss you. how more obvious can she be about how she feels about you? it has just as much of a chance of working as any other relationship. at least you are going into it with open eyes and know what the obstacles are. take care.