I havent cut in a few weeks YEY for me but why am i not happy? Because of the reason that actually kept me from cutting ...go figure. When i went to the doctors the first time in for a really really long time i guess i had psyched myself up to get ready to have some answers. Not a problem right? I wasnt expecting him to say i know exactly what is wrong but a general possiblity with possible remedies would be nice. I got there told him my symptoms and decided to check out my belly. This is when i started praying. My FUTURE mother in law was sitting in the room along with my boyfriend. I couldnt be more mortified. He started pressing down with my tee shirt still covering me..thank God i breathed a sigh of relief..then all of a sudden it was like slow motion. I couldnt rip my shirt down and scream no..otherwise id draw attention to miss witch sitting in the corner. But he did...and to my dismay...which i knew it would happen...he saw the scars...he kept poking at them like a child seeing if a bug was dead...i was like dear God...and he said "what the..." and looked at me..it was dead silent. I looked at him and shook my head no and peirced my lips. Then thank God he pulled my shirt down and left. The worse part the absolutly WORSE part was that in the end he said i was a hypochondriac...we all know why he said this...he was being a jerk. He saw those scars and immediatly thought this was another way. You know i COULD have gotten them some other way...but did he ask that noooo....he gave me cholesterol tests and diabetes tests...safe tests just to make me happy in thinking he was doing something...he gave me laxatives..even though i was going like crazy...just to satisfy me with giving me meds...my scars have made me like the plague...thats why i do them on my stomach...so i wouldnt have to go through that...but i thought THOUGHT that the doctor would be different...i guess i am wrong...he has hurt me deeplly and now i cant help feel alittle tramatized and paranoid about other doctors and cutting...but maybe this will help me stop cutting..i guess thats the good part...but cant i stop for some other...nice reason? Thanks for listening...love, inny