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Apr 23, 2014, 05:22 AM
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Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 8,406
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I hate holidays, especially my birthday. My mother turned holidays into opportunities for her to control everyone, dress us up like dolls and live out happy family fantasies...until she flew into BPD fueled rages. Before I cut off all contact with her, she ruined Christmas by flying into a raging paranoid psychosis, throwing things at me and her new husband from 9pm until 4am.
And my birthday was always celebrated like it was her birthday. In fact, this coming Sunday is my birthday and I'm trying to figure out how to reclaim it.
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?
Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.
Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien
Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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