Can't believe I'm even admitting that. Why can't I be normal and love normal ****ing people who aren't priests/ therapists/ authority figures/ emotionally unavailable manchildren/ insert various inappropriate person here.

I think you're trying to apply the rules of social relationships to a T/client relationship, and it just doesn't work that way. The fact that you feel you have a pattern of falling for unattainable partners shows that this is exactly what you need to work on. And your transference is the medium to do so. Because it's a safe and boundaried relationship, you can use it as a lab to experiment and explore these familiar feelings with/for your T. It will stretch you, mystify you, exhilarate you, and sometimes twist you into knots, for sure. But it could also be the best work you'll ever do that could change your life.