This is very bizzare to me and I have never experienced it before. I have been doing great for a little over a month due to my new meds. Fetzima and Lamictal. Totally knocked out the deep depression I had been in for so long. I thought finally I had found something that worked. It was going great.

Then all of a sudden Sunday afternoon on Easter the depression came crashing back like getting hit upside the head with a brick. My family was all together for the whole weekend. I should point out that over the past two years they have been very loving and supportive around all the problems I have had with depression. I would be homeless without them. They have done their best to understand it. Before I was in CA my whole life and they were never really around me to see what i was going through. The last five years they have seen it up close and I know it has been hard for them but they have been very supportive and understanding.

I can't possibly think of what could have triggered this brick in the head. I figure it has to related to my family being here all weekend but I can't really put my finger on it. I am kind of pissed that no one really inquired how I was really doing and what I have been going through, but it is an uncomfortable subject for them I guess. I do feel isolated from them even when I was doing so good. No way can they ever understand what it is truly like and I don't expect them to. I think the main problem is they all have kids and families and are doing pretty good financially and have good jobs and all that. I can't help comparing myself to them and I just don't live up. I am living at my parents and don't have a job or any income and feel like a total loser. They all have good lives they are living and things to look forward to etc etc.

I am the black sheep of the family and always have been but this is the worse condition financially and job wise I have ever been in. At least I was self sufficient my whole life.

So it is either somehow family triggered or it is just my depression switch turned back on. When I come out of one I am usually good for 4 or 5 months. I don't see how the meds could have just stopped working in an instant.

I can't afford therapy right now or I would go. So I have to use these forums.