Once you tell your GC maybe letting your family know is something you could do together so you don't have to face it alone? That might be one way to face any emotions that come up for your family; you need support and help right now so I really hope you can share things with your GC and that you contact a suicide hotline if the thoughts return

You can find some of their numbers here:
Common Hotline Phone Numbers | Psych Central

Please keep looking for help