amelia, i'm so sorry that happened. i think because it can be a lie one's abuser uses to deny their abuse it can really set us off and bring up past anger & resentment. i have a parent who refuses to acknowledge that anything was wrong in our family and trust me it wasn't 1/5 of what you've experienced. it's still abuse though. so, i know it totally pushes my buttons when people just refuse to see wrongdoing and call it for what it is. with the person you are dealing with they are just not understanding how you could possibly be so positive and have experienced so much healing so are trying to rationalize it somehow to make sense for themself. they are probably coming from a perspective where things like that just don't happen so they are trying to make sense of something that doesn't make sense to them. your anger is totally legitimate but i know how frustrating it is when you are like "okay, i'd like to stop feeling angry now" and it's still there. one thing that has amazingly worked for me is to just turn it over (to God) and keep turning it over each time it comes up. sometimes that is through writing angry letters that i don't send and sometimes just making the mental decision to turn it over. after awhile it is then gone. i couldn't believe it the first time it happened. after all they know not what they say...