i officially feel like therapy is totally out of my control. i have two therapists which is already pretty overwhelming and now they have talked to each other. Originally i wanted them to talk to each other because i thought it would be great for my first Therapist to be able to tell my second therapist how things have gone for the past year or two but now i don’t like it because they are working together, they came up with a plan to make me better.

Now my first Therapist doesn’t want me to come in with pages of stuff to talk about, because She is now helping with the depression and not the OCD. But the pages of stuff sometimes has to do with depression too. And my second therapist doesn’t want me to bring in the pages either, she wants me to do these exercises and homework she assigned me.

i have always felt like showing my Therapist these pages of stuff has helped a lot. The guilt goes away and i don’t think about the stuff i wrote so much any more. Plus i want to tell Her everything, it is something that helps a lot.

Is there anything i can do about this? i want to keep both therapists but i still want to show the pages of stuff to my first Therapist. It is really important to me.

i feel bad about even posting this because i feel like i'm talking behond Her back. i should just talk to my Therapist about this on Friday when i see Her. i see an OCD therapist because She recommended it. It feels really good to tell my first Therapist everything and for that to be taken away from me is really hard so i'm going to bring the pages on Friday and see what happens.