You aren't alone. Sex is really complicated and any type of abuse or assault makes it very, confusing /scary. Therapy can help tremendously and then having a partner that is loving and understanding and loves you with or without sex helps. May angels surround you.
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Be like water making its way through cracks, do not be
assertive, but adjust to the object, if nothing within you stays
rigid, outward things will disclose themselves. --Bruce Lee
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