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Originally Posted by Asiablue
What does therapy leave you with? It spends so much time stripping away the layers, the defenses.
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Others may disagree but what I learned from therapy is that defenses at one point served to protect you from emotional harm. The problem becomes those same defenses are harmful by interfering with your everyday life, well-being and happiness. Those defenses weren't healthy or good to begin with but that is all you had or knew at the time. I think what you need to explore with your therapist is replacing those old, outdated defenses with healthy, life affirming coping tools.
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It makes you look at life as it is, it makes you accept the life that was or wasn't. [/quote[
Often times the way we viewed the world was distorted by the past. You are in a better place when you can say, "all I know is that I do not know but I'm willing and happy to find out." Whereas before you may have thought you were perceiving everything spot on but it was all distorted. Now you are free from the distortion, but that's not the end. What you may want to explore with your therapist is what is your truth about the world in a healthy way.
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I can't stand the amount of loss I'm dealing with. I can't stand how sh.it my childhood was and that I lost it and can never get it back. I can't stand that I have to be responsible for making things ok for myself when I wasn't the one who f.ucked me up in the first place. So much loss.... I feel like I can't bear it sometimes.
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Something you may want to explore with your therapist is who would you be now if you had an ideal childhood. Once you know that person how do you now become that person.
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Sometimes I wish I could go back to the life numbing depression when I was miserable but didn't know why, instead of being in this acute sense of awareness of everything, of all the loss, of all the heartbreak and of all the work still to be done. It's not fair. 
Can someone please tell me what therapy replaces all this with? That there is a point to it all?
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In the end therapy replaces the depression with happiness. Along the way through this post I've kind of tried to guide you to topics that start leading to you being happy. You were miserable and didn't know why and without therapy you would have just stayed miserable and not know why. What therapy does is tell you, "you don't know how to be happy until you know why you are miserable." Now, you know why you are miserable. You are acutely aware of it. Now is the time to work with your therapist on what to do with your new awareness, process it and turn it into a happier life.