I completely agree. I know that when I am committed to someone, no one else is an option. I enjoy the person I am with and focus all of my usual 'flirting' in his direction. I do understand that being with someone for a long period of time, things may get stagnant. But flirting to me reads exactly how you explain it wild, showing interest in someone else. Why else would you be flirting? I know a part of it comes down to security, being secure in your relationship and within yourself, but I don't see what that has to do with giving someone else the attention that your spouse should be giving you.