View Single Post
 
Old Apr 24, 2014, 02:31 PM
Anonymous200265
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by bxgpsy View Post
Hi, I am new here and have recently been feeling a lot of the same things you describe, I feel that emptiness, I spend a lot of time turning it all over in my mind. Last night I was thinking about something a shrink asked me not too long ago. "What do you live for?" at that time I answered "nothing" that was when I had checked myself in to the psych ward. I am completely isolated in this lame town in the middle of nowhere, there are no support groups here or anything, I don't have any friends, the ones I did have have all dropped me. I don't love anyone and no one loves me, the only living beings I seem to love are the animals. But I was thinking last night about that question what do I live for and I came up with this answer " I am here" another words, I exist! and then I got to thinking why in hell can't that just be enough right now, **** all the trying to be somebody crap everybody is so wrapped up in. In this sick culture that we live in, it is no wonder that intelligent and sensitive people like us are depressed! I don't know if this makes any sense to you, but I just thought for me that maybe it is a good place to just be right now. I really really do understand how dark this is believe me! I have struggled with depression all of my life, I am now 60 years old. I wish you peace of mind!
Thanks very much for the post . I have asked myself a similar thing regularly, "What do I really want in life?", but unfortunately my answer is simple - nothing. I just have no desire to want anything anymore. I know that's crazy, because everybody wants stuff, right? Well, my entire life, I've never asked for anything, I've never wanted anything. I've never wanted anybody's love or appreciation even. I've never even cared if my own parents didn't love me, even though they do very much. What I mean is, it's not something I desire like others do. I don't desire money, wealth, wife, children, none of it. Part of it comes from the conclusion that I've drawn long ago that I'll never be capable of attaining those things, I'm just not "in the same league" as the rest of the world. I'm an empty shell with nothing to offer. I know that sounds unbelievable, but it's so true. I'm just speaking from experience.