oh, it is so simple to have retorts like our mothers used to have...but i learned to bite my tongue and not cause my kids to have feelings hurt over comments i could make when frustrated...todays retort to 'i hate you' can be as simple as 'yeah, yeah, woteva' , love you too' and then act like nothing was ever said...the 8-12 age is difficult one..some times they act grown up, other times like babies, and the worst part is, they dont know when they wake up each day, which one they gonna be - so how can we know....lol....i do remember the door slamming to my daughters room often in that age span...but we and the door survived well....