Hello Benjamin, thank you for starting this thread. And thank you, too, to Perna, Alexandra and others for the substantive insights.

This conversation directly touches on the issue I cam to this discussion fretting about -- my inability to make that positive emotional connection with so many of my students. Indeed, I was a child with a dysfunctional childhood that did not provide me with examples for expressing emotions constructively.

I am an introvert in a society that values extroverts; I am thoughtful and cannot always think quickly on my feet to provide great empathic nurturing responses. And, when I am deepest in thought, I tend to be a defensive communicator (and yes, I'm using that phrase consistent with communication discipline research). I do my best to implement so-called immediacy behavior -- eye contact, turning to face a student, leaning into the conversation, listening before speaking, paraphrasing, etc., but I feel that all too rarely does it project as genuine, rather than a mask I wear.

I have excellent teaching methodologies and I have mastered my field so that I can hold forth with little preparation on most topics that I am required to teach.

I am going to see if my library has a tape set about this book that I can borrow.