Hi, sunflowerX0, and welcome to Psych Central! Alas, some of these drugs can knock us for a loop. I had to go off of Depakote because it caused really bad shaking of my hands.

Hon, I understand what you are saying. I want my life back, too. I had to go through a whole slew of meds before they found a combo that seems to help without too many side effects.

Are you also seeing a therapist? I find that helpful for bipolar, at least when I get a bit stable.

Hang in here. There is hope!