The first meeting I ever went to I was half drunk. Other meetings I attended on and off over the years the first thing I would do was go get a six pack after the meeting.

When I was finally ready to really get sober it has actually been easy ever since and far as the obsession. The moment I made a decision to check myself into a treatment center I experienced a huge psychic shift. I was at my bottom. There is another saying that you can get off the elevator at any floor. Everyone's bottom is different. Not everyone has a huge psychic shift right away everyone is different.

My story is complicated in the beginning because the last five years of my using I was doing meth heavy. But the reason I went to so many meetings and jumped in head first was because I was flying high. My depression was totally gone.

A lot of people are court ordered (a nudge from the judge) and have no intention of staying or getting sober. Once they are done with court requirements they figure they are out of there. There are a whole bunch of those people who decide to stay and stay sober.

You worry you won't fit in. If you are an addict I predict you will never have experienced a place where you fit in more. Most of us have always felt like we didn't fit in anywhere and finally we found a place.

Some people get what we call a pink cloud. Maybe you go to a couple of meetings and have a little bit of clean time and being welcomed and fitting in and the sense of relief just knocks the crap out of that depression and you get on the pink cloud. Ride that baby as long as you can because it doesn't last forever and then you have to get down to work.

Anyway the most important thing you highlighted was We can't do it alone. and the only thing you should worry about is getting yourself to that first meeting.