book suggestion from your first sentence containing "baby rage"
have you read this? and if so thoughts please! am an adopted person who is now adult and have checked into this issue before but am only now learning about this deep loss that can be there even if everything was planned and smooth.
TWENTY THINGS ADOPTED KIDS WISH THEIR ADOPTIVE PARENTS KNEW
Written by Sherri Eldridge
October 1999
978-0-440-50838-0 (0-440-50838-X)
link to publishers site
btw your writings are powerful in your focus on your healing despite whatever challenges life continues to put in your way. go mouse_ !