For the first time in probably 2 years I went almost 8 whole days with a "stable" mood. I wasn't Manic or depressed... everything was how i see what other people go through day to day... it was like i was normal. I was even sleeping at night. Like 7 hours a night. it was great. Then last night I woke up at 11 pm and i've been up since... I got maybe 2 hours of sleep. My moods are going everywhere again and I don't know where i'm going to end up next with them. I started dissociating again. I know some of this is from lack of sleep, but i was doing so good. I did what I said I wouldn't and I got my hopes up... i'm just tired of doing this. I'm tired of not knowing what i'm going to be like next, and I don't want to get as bad as I usually do.. it's exhausting and seems like i'm fighting a battle that can't be won.