first of all i am going to try and by objective and unbiased as possible, which i admit is going to be difficult, most people the minute they hear sex offender the answer is to "run", "get away from this man" . i'm not going to say that because
of several reasons people tend to stigmatize things they don't like or understand( oh, she's got BPD run..he's bi polar..run). obviously your husband is sick (whether he committed the crime or not is irrelevant) he did something to put himself in a situation where he ended up in prison, he needs help. you my friend have to decide if you want to be there by his side or not. it would be no different than hypothetically if i (who suffers from severe BPD) was your husband and did something really f"d up like maybe cheating on you..both are considered heinous crimes any way you slice it, you as a wife have to decide if you are going to stay by his side or not. technically when you get married it is supposed to be "for better or worse in sickness and in health" this is obviously a "for worse" situation and i think there is no doubt the "sickness" part fits quite well, now for me i have NO SYMPATHY for a sex offender & i'm probably wrong for that and i accept it, they are obviously mentally ill as i am mentally ill as well, just in a different way. colon cancer is different than leukemia but they are both still illnesses /sicknesses. with that being said this is the hand you have been dealt & you need to take time to decide what it is you are going to do, a porn addiction is no different from crack,heroin,alcohol or meth..these people can't just up and decide not to look at porn, it's not that easy for them..they know they shouldn't but they will still relapse form time to time. i do think his making you feel guilty is not cool, maybe that's the only way he knows to ask for help..men have this funny little thing called an ego that makes it very difficult to admit they need help so they try to obtain help though other means sometimes( us silly guys..shame on us! hee hee) i'm being as honest and objective as possible,
i have to admit it is not easy...next do you love him,right now,right here your love for him is being sorely tested & i must admit i don't envy your situation, i waited a long time to post on this thread cause i really been thinking about this one. you have a lot of time invested in this man and this relationship, it's a sex crime i'm assuming he went to prison for, i don't like sex offenders at all,
that's my personal opinion so i said to myself let me put my personal biases aside and see if i can be of some help..you have got a hell of a mess on your hands & there are no easy answers..but there sure are some really,really tough questions that you are going to have to answer for yourself....

1) are you willing to stay by his side, knowing he IS going to sneak and look at that porn from time to time, relapse is a normal part of recovery.

2) are you willing to stay by his side not knowing if he is serious about his recovery and he may not even want help

3) are you willing to put up with his manipulation,from my experience people that go to prison are "changed" something about that place does strange things to people ( i don't know if i have the right to call anyone strange as messed up as i am..but...)

4) are you willing to deal with the possibility( no matter how remote or likely)
that he repeats and goes back to prison.

5) are you willing to throw away your marriage of 18 years because of something that happened that was beyond your control & you have been with him through 5 years of prison and just now walk away.

6) most importantly DO YOU STILL LOVE HIM? or are you staying because of a sense of duty.DO YOU TRUST HIM? CAN YOU TRUST HIM?

i feel like you are definitely between a rock and a hard place,this one really really got me thinking,which was good for me keeps my mind off my little relationship problems which pale in comparison to yours. i do believe the best thing to do is take some time and consider what all of the posters have said
and do what's best for the both of you, not just what is best for him or whats best for you, IMHO when you get married it is no longer about just you..which makes this one so difficult for me because i personally take marriage very seriously & i don't think one should just walk away from their obligations when things get tough and i think this is about as tough as at gets. wow you really have a mess on your hands and i know that i probably shouldn't keep saying that because it's probably not helping but i really don't know what else to say.

good luck, i hope somehow things work out