I think this is precisely why people are so determined to call it a disease vs. a psychological disorder, to shift the blame away from themselves and onto something else. Before you hate me though, hear me out. I come from a lineage of depressed alcoholics, and I have also had those issues, depression, addiction. I can, very easily, blame my parents for my defects. I am depressed because it is genetic and my parents abused me, I am an addict because I inherited a disease, I started using drugs because my parents abused me. This absolves me from the guilt and shame of the effects of my actions on myself and others. But... the negatives of having this belief are enormous, because it is a lie.

The second you tell yourself this you actually are powerless, and you have nothing to work on either, because you have an "incurable" disease. You become mired in your problem, which is inescapable because it's out of your control. It extends beyond alcoholism, it is actually a life style, a very human one that everyone does, where we literally are addicted to assigning blame for every action or fault. I'm not saying if you have a drug or alcoholism problem to try to use moderation, no, if you are struggling then stop! When I said alcoholism is a "thing" that was just to save time. I'm not going to argue that using substances is habit forming, and that physical and psychological addictions develop. They certainly do and are real! But I do not believe we are as helpless as we like to think we are. The fact is, one day I had enough and I went to an AA meeting, and I don't believe God saved me and damned my closest friend (who is now dead of this disease). We have power over our thoughts, not vice-a-versa. Utilizing that power may be very difficult though, I believe it is a life long endeavor everyone should make. I don't think it's easy, I don't think it's overnight, but I think we all have the capability to change ourselves and our thoughts.

AA actually helped me reach this conclusion ironically. Somewhere along the line doing step 4, finding my fault in absolutely everything, everything but my addictions and self harm! Somewhere where I was finding my blame in my resentments against my abusers maybe... where I realized, hey if I'm to blame for holding a resentment against someone who abused me as a child, how am I not to blame for that relapse last week where I sniffed an 8 ball got a DUI and who knows what else.