As you may be aware...the "3some" issue is just the tip of the iceberg. From what you wrote it sounds like both of you are not dealing with your life in a very healthy manner (he manipulated you into not going to your counseling session).

It's good that you are getting help for yourself...but it is obvious your self-esteem is not in a good place if you contiune to allow your boyfriend to treat you as he does. Ask your counselor how to deal with the issue of him threatening suicide.

ADULTS are free to AGREE on what they mutually want to do sexually. But if emotions are shaky in the 1st place the 3some is not going to be helpful. It would be another "high" or an escape from the real issues.

biskf, not sure what your agreement is with your wife...but what you are not "allowed" to have....usually results in you eventually doing things in secert and that is not good for the marriage either - I hope you find your answer to dealing with your passion.