...so what I'm hearing you say is that he doesn't deserve an apology, but apologizing might make you feel better about getting angry with him and showing it. So, the apology wouldn't be real. It would just be about you and about what you're feeling about yourself...

If that's the case, and you DO choose to apologize, do you think it will make you feel any better about yourself? Or do you think you'll just end up beating yourself up for demeaning yourself by "apologizing" to a guy who deserved to feel your pain and anger?

The way your boyfriend chose to leave you was cowardly, contemptable and immature. You are much better off without someone who has demonstrated the capacity to treat you so cruelly.

You owe him no apology.