After a 3.5 year relationship (and a friendship for about a year before we started dating), my ex-boyfriend broke up with me while he was overseas vising family by sending me a Facebook message. I was at work and not expecting the message. In fact, I'd taken him to the airport when he left, and was planning to pick him up when he returned from his trip.

For several weeks after the message, he refused to return any phone calls or e-mails. Basically, a four relationship ended with a single paragraph e-mail.

I tried to take the high ground once we actually spoke about two months later and eventually got over the end of the relationship thinking we'd one day be able to be friends.

However, I have not been able to get over the way that he broke up with me since he refused to ever meet with me face to face. It's as if he completely ignored all the time we spent together, including plenty of good times.

This this past weekend, after not seeing him for six months, I finally got angry. I had been drinking wine with a neighbor and was definitely intoxicated. I went to his house (took taxi) and confronted him. Although I'd taken the high ground since the break up, I definitely behaved badly during this conversation. After the confrontation, I don't believe that a friendship would ever be possible. I'm okay with this...I don't think I could ever be friends with someone who treated me the way that he did. But, I feel as if I lowered myself to his level by my own behavior.

If I had acted the way I did with family or a close friend, I'd definitely apologize. But, given the lack of real consideration he's given me, I don't think he deserves an apology...BUT, I wonder if apologizing is just something a decent person does...I don't want to interact with him at all, but I was always taught to take responsibility for my actions...even if the other person is also to blame. I feel guilty for my behavior although all of my friends have wondered why it took me so long to express my anger.

Is lashing out this way every acceptable or should an apology be given?