I think he brought the bartender up because you both had had too much to drink and were disappointed you could not go to the strip club. For him, it was sort of a next-best-thing idea off the cuff of his inebriated imagination.

Men want to have sex with women; I do not get jealous when my husband appreciates another women's looks/sex "appeal" but get into the discussion with him -- not about him and the other person but just about whether I find the other person attractive or think I would if I were a guy, etc. I do not take it personally: I only take personally what is said to and about me :-)

My husband and my relationship is based on more than just the sex. I do not feel I am interchangeable with another woman, at any time. My husband was married before but that does not mean he "swapped" his ex-wife for me or me for his ex-wife.

Neither of you "know" the bartender, your boyfriend was thinking of her in fantasy/"thing" mode as in "I wonder what that would be like? Maybe we might like to check it out." You were not interested at that time (and apparently don't imagine you will be ever) so it did not happen. That your boyfriend then went on to his impression of an earlier part of the evening and dwelled on that, he was drunk. Laugh at him and tell him to go to bed, that you were not flirting and don't intend to flirt with any other guy while you are with him, you don't fancy being that kind of girlfriend.