I will add that I did eventually bring it up with my pdoc. In a cryptic way of course, since like you, I was too embarrassed to be more direct. I phrased it that I was attracted to a man I could not become involved with, was concerned and didn't know if I should talk to him about it. My pdoc asked me what I'd want to get out of the conversation - did I want to stop talking to this person? I told him no, I just was afraid I was getting too obsessive about him. He said not to use the word "obsessive", that it has negative connotations. I just like this person, that's all. He pointed out that I was still doing well at work, in school, with my kids. So, I was still functioning normally. I agreed and he told me not to worry so much. He said take it as an opportunity to even flirt a little if I want - It's what keeps up feeling human and alive.

It was really that simple, and I have to say this little conversation really took a weight off my shoulders. Since then I've been much more open, authentic, and less obsessive about him since.

I'm not saying it will work for you or that your T would even take the same approach. But maybe it's worth considering trying baby steps. Bring up something vague about an attraction you have for an unavailable man and how it seems to be on your mind a lot. See if he promotes any discussion or not. It could be worth a try, you never know. It did help me though, so there is hope out there.

Feel free to PM me anytime too...