Im currently seeing a pdoc and am taking the antidepressants I was prescribed when I was 15. I have repeatedly stopped taking them on my own and then started retaking them (about 3 times) when I began to feel out of control again. They give me some short term relief from the depression but it never lasts too long and Ive always had to get frequent increases in dosage. A past pdoc wanted to put me on abilify or a mood stabilizer but I didnt want to because Id heard of the possible side effects and blood tests, but based off other peoples experiences theyre not all like this. cost is an issue too as I am not on health insurance at the moment. I was always a moody child and would throw horrible temper tantrums. I broke my moms car windshield once in a rage. everyone said they thought I had the bipolar gene that runs in my family even back then. I had my first major depressive episode when I was 12. When I was 15 my parents sent me to pdoc and I was diagnosed with major depression. 6 months ago I was diagnosed with bp2. I actually regret to say I have had sex with other guys while being with him. At the times I didnt want to know if I wanted to be with him and not thinking clearly I was focusing on other guys I was attracted to and gave in without the blink of an eye. Im just having a really hard time right now and am tired of the mood cycles.