Ok so since I wrote that first post which I admit was way too lengthy and a bit of a rant I've had some time to cool off and think things through. I know this girl is never going to have any sort of lasting relationship with him. From what I know of her and what others who have known her longer tell me she is just a tease and enjoys drama. Is 27, a virgin, and never had a relationship longer than 6 months.

I also realize he needs friends outside of us and that guys tend to test their freedom when they feel suffocated or trapped in a relationship. Which happens around the time the honeymoon phase wears off. I'd like for him to pursue friendships other than her, and when he transfers shifts he will be around other people and have that opportunity. I know working nights has killed both our social lives and we need to have friendships outside this small group of people. I can handle them being friends so long as he puts me first and doesn't pursue her. I just have to trust him on that.

After the major drama settled down he has shown that he wants to work on our relationship. There were things I complained about that he does work on. Physical touch, teasing excessively etc. We started going to church again which we both drifted from. I wandered a lot and was lost in a very dark place for awhile after my divorce. I want to become more active in that community and when I find a day job as well(resume's in keep fingers crossed) I plan to do just that. Part of me is taking all this as a test from God to help us grow. Whether I can have faith and trust in another person. Whether I can stand by someone when things aren't easy(in past I've just bailed). We both are at points in our lives where we do need to grow up some and focus on what the future holds. I don't think that kind of maturity comes without some sort of test or hardship though. At least not in all cases. Sometimes you need a slap in the face that says hey stop doing the same dumb things.

We do have some space. Like I said I'm going out with friends. Trying not to get angry when he wants to hang out with that one friend. And encouraging him to hang out with other friends. I may be being a fool for giving it a second chance, but I do love him and can't just give up on it if there is the chance to work things out and be better in the end. I'm prepared if things don't go as I hope though.