Thanks for all the responses, I appreciate the thoughts and ideas that you've put forward. I kinda get the idea that the word "addict" is subjective now, which is kind of nice. But it also makes communication about it pretty hard, and sort of arbitrary.

Maybe the point I was making was contradictory to the action of making this thread, maybe that was a mistake. I wanted to express that I don't want to think about it anymore but in doing that I made it a focus. Either way, I see it now that I am not an addict and I suppose I was looking for some kind of affirmation in that. Turns out I don't need that affirmation since the word itself is just a mess.