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Is it possible that you subconsciously want someone to notice how much you are struggling, so they can help you or just express some empathy for what you are going through? Or maybe you're getting tired of keeping it a secret, and you just want it out in the open?
I think there could be a huge number of reasons for why you'd possibly want to do this. If you're seeing a therapist, perhaps you could talk to him/her about it.
__________________
Everyone wants happiness,
No one wants pain,
But you can't have a rainbow
Without a little rain.
I am attempting recovery from depression, social anxiety, self harm, suicidal ideation, and some crappy life stuff.
The last time I self harmed: 3/17/14
In therapy since: 1/13/14
I threw my blade away on June 6, 2014. 
I'm always happy to help. Please send me a message if you ever need to talk about anything. 
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