First off, no I would never tell her her daughter was talking to me. I knew wherr she was at that point and it would be unfair for me to bring up something like that. That girl doesnt deserve it and plus, by the girl's reaction when she saw me I am guessing her mother chose not to poison her mind against me since she knew had a relationahip, which is decent of her.
Now to your question. Honestly I understand her reaction 110%. I would probably feel the same way she does, only difference being I like to acomodate people to much and not have them mad at me so I probably wouldnt act the way she does, but I totally understand and respect the that. Howeever that doesnt make my hurt feelings any different as you understand.
And I honestly cant say why I said it. She had been prodding at me since the layoffs so I think she had a feeling I knew something beforehand because she kept asking that specifically and I kept saying no. I did share with her (after we got our letters) that I was being kept on (in a different capacity) because I didnt want her to find THAT out from someone else. In reality I regret deeply telling her I knew of the layoffs because as someone else also told me, that was my biggest mistake. I shouldve just kept up the charade because she wouldnt have been non-the wiser. I told her in a moment of weakness, my feelings and anxiety were eating me alive by that point and something had happened at work that made me very umcomfortable and upset. At that moment while she tried to get me to look at the situation from all sides to calm doqn she asked me again if I knew beforehand (which thinking now was an odd question to ask at that point) and I was weak and said yes and that is when everything essentially ended.
I know I shouldve left well enough alone. When she knew I would stay on she took it as well as one could and said I shouldnt feel bad for her because what God intended for her no one could take away, but obviously me saying too much caused this mess. I am trying really hard to move on which is why its a problem. Not a day goes by where I dont think about her, when I remember the good times and I feel totaly upset that they are just a memory that she may be thinking now was just fake. I miss our relationship and I hate that it got ruined because I cant think.
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