Thank you and no your response was appreciated. To an extent I am glad you didnt instead insist I was completley right or blameless because most people don't. Or at least not friwnds and family, but of course they stick up for me and some already had reservations about her from what I said in the past about her (nothing bad but some friends thought she was being harsh by trying to change me or tell me what I needed to change about myself).

She wasnt the type of person I ever expected to get close to and you could say she was my first "real" grown up relationship, so its just weird that it was so simply broken.

I did tell my friend I believe this was a lesson fate has to teach me because in some ways she was bwcoming my crutch. She was my guide, and now its time to guide myself, however difficult this situation is.

I am trying really hard to move on but I cant help it most of the time. I am an over-thinker of sorts, in that I go over situations and things over and over in my head, trying to decipher and see every aspect. Find a reason for everything. If I felt like I had some sort of closure maybe I wouldnt be so caught up, but somehow I dont think thats is the only reason why I am so pained. I guess time heals all wounds, I just hope/wish I never have to reallg meet her anywhere for the next few years so I cam grieve away from her presence, but in such a small town that is very difficult.

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