My mom was horribly cruel and she was a nurse! Sounds like your mom could maybe be feeling guilty or confused or frustrated about what is happening to you. She doesn't appear to have a great deal of empathy though. But moms are people too.

Maybe you can let her know what you need from her and if she can't provide that, you'll have to accept it. And tell your mom that getting well from a mental illness is not a race and there is no magic pill that will cure you 100%. You're obviously are doing your part to get better, so pat yourself on the back.

I've come to realize that I have to learn to mother myself the way my mom couldn't.