Hi hvert, I'm sorry your mother is making you feel like that, but I'd say a "homemade" present should be seen as thoughtful and caring so nice idea. And if she complains about gifts maybe just ask her what sort of thing she would like next time instead?
As for taking her out then it shouldn't be down to you to keep on footing the bill, in fact you shouldn't need to be planning it every time either.
So could you agree with your siblings that you're going to take it in turns to plan meas out, and that they're going to need to pay for themselves and a share of your mothers meal out?
Alison
P.S. I'd say that you should really find a time to talk to her about some of the other things she's been doing that are bothering you and how they're making you feel. Some things she might not realize she's doing or how much they are effecting you and others maybe you could reach a compromise on???