I used to binge purge.

I stopped because of the long term damage I was doing to myself and now I'm wishing it wasn't bad for me, so I could do it again. Not sure why, I just feel like it would make me feel better/different/successful (screwed up i know)

I'm finding it hard to stop myself, determined not to though!

I feel like I want to cut and smoke as well, but I won't.

It just feels like everything is building up and I need to let go somehow. I don't know where this feeling has come from