I remember last week I posted in the roll call about how I was going to ask my psychiatrist for a less sedating antipsychotic (because I stopped taking my current one two months ago) to help with the negative symptoms when in reality, I was full of positive symptoms and going psychotic. I refused the meds and blamed it on someone else in my head (dont ask) and then started taking my original when I got home which took intense thinking multiple times to cross that line between real and not real. So tomorrow is my next appointment where I can have a more sane session.

I think getting rid of the positive symptoms helps to alleviate the negative symptoms because I've tried basically every common class of medications except opiates and psychiatrists don't prescribe those for the mind so..