Quote:
Originally Posted by soccerdad
I'm not keeping score but I know that deep down inside I want to come home and have everything be alright and have my marriage be great. Everytime she says that we can make things better and something regresses back to where it was it hurts all over again. I genuinely believe that I can be happy with her for the rest of my life if some things change. I love her and I did marry her after all but we both keep saying we will get there and we keep ending up at the same exact spot. How many chances am I supposed to give this?
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My x and I went through the exact same thing. I was the one getting help and wanted to work on changing the relationship. He did not care to get help - but wanted the relationship to change too. The resentment built up so high - spent a lot of time "hoping" things would get better and remembering the way things were in order to hold on. It did not work...But we did not have children. I did step out of my marriage for comfort. Cheating was a symptom. I do not know how many chances it takes. IMO if you are ready to call it quits you will notice the things that bother you the most.
It's not easy making a decision -but it will be yours and then you will go on. I know you have a wife and children .... I do not believe people were meant to suffer constantly - it will only lead to other behaviors that may not be good for you or a marriage.