I feel uncomfortable and anxious in places where there's happiness, laughter and peace. Unfortunately, where I live, everyone is either happy or depressed, both things make me uncomfortable.

I am very at ease when there's extreme hostility and people going crazy, screaming and fighting with each other. I think this is because me parents were always fighting hysterically with each other all my life. However, they recently divorced, so now I am stuck in this stupid peaceful situation and it's tearing me apart. I have already asked them to get back together again just so they can go at it again, but they refuse to do so.

I want to ask for ideas for places I can go to where everyone is attacking each other so I can join in. I've been giving this a lot of thought, but couldn't come up with anything.

PS: there's no way i'm going to join the army, because I think it's cowardly what they are doing in the east, it's like kicking a person when their down. I want true WAR, like lions fighting each other, true threat... not a coward who kicks someone when no ones watching, or when the other can't fight back.